Things I NEVER Thought I’d Say
on the World Race
Praise God, we don’t need a poop-stick for this outhouse.
No thanks. I’d rather take a bucket shower.
Let’s hope for the 24-hour bus ride, instead of the 30.
Aaaaaand if I don’t want to take malaria meds…?
Me: Dude, I’ve had ZERO TIME to shower. I’m going on three days now.
Abbey: Tomorrow’s day six for me.
Me: We only have time for one thing today…what do you think? Shower or internet?
Abbey and me, together: INTERNET!
Me, trying to ask an elderly woman: “Will you be baptized again as an adult?”
“Baptiste tambien por tu mujera?“
Which actually translates to:
“Baptist again per your woman-a?”
#SpanishFAIL
While praying over our teammate Kayla during Team Time: “Okay, guys. Holy Spirit is telling me we should start massaging her back.”
I don’t know, but Deuteronomy’s getting really good.
In Puerto Rico/the Caribbean:
Me: It’s been a lot easier to stay warm in the hammock at night now that I figured out to use my sleeping bag.
Karen: What were you using before?
Me: I was bundling up in my thermal stuff.
Karen (confused): Kay. It’s 70-degrees at night.
Me: I know! I’ve been wearing all my Norway gear!
🙂
In the Dominican Republic: Is anyone showering in the waterfall tonight?
Um, I only know like three songs…but sure. I’ll lead worship.
I was kinda worried because I didn’t know how to make the crema, but then Jesus showed me.
Kate (as she looks at all my fries that fell on the sidewalk): Are you going to eat those?
Me (as I pick them all up and blow the dirt off them): YEP!
#BillSwanAPPROVED
Dude! We’re two-and-a-half miles closer to the sun!
Me (to Jenny, thru the window at church): She peed on me. She did it on purpose, too!
Me (aloud, to Jesus): I know this sounds bad, but…I reeeeeally don’t want to get lice, Father.
Jesus: (laughing)
Me (with chagrin): It’s not funny.
Me: I have a Valentine’s Day gift for God, and I want it to be a surprise. You think if I ask Him not to search my heart for a few hours I’ll be able to keep it a secret till I can give it to Him?
Alyssha: I think it’s cute that you think God doesn’t know about the “surprise” Valentine’s gift you’re going to give Him.
Coming to you LIVE from Bolivia, peeps. 🙂
